Not that outsmarting Zeke requires being more clever than your average steam shovel, but here’s to all the class brains/smarty-britches/eggheads of the world…and, believe it or choose not to, I was my classes’ version of that up through eighth grade! From all appearances, though, I may have intellectually piqued then…
Zeke’s getting the hang of this whole prediction thing after all! Sure, only the first half of the most recent Super Bowl went as he foretold, but check out him nailing that the Panthers would trade with the Bears to acquire the first overall pick in the draft! Not bad! If you add up all of his predictive successes, Our Rhino On The Street is right slightly more often than a busted clock!
It’s here! It’s here! The 2023 NFL Combine is finally here!!! Hoooo…rah? For those who’re unaware (and can’t really much blame ya if you are), the NFL Combine is the annual National Football League get-together of would-be draftees to see how well they perform in a variety of “important” skills and gym-class-like activities. Many question its relevance and even its need to exist, but we at FLEA FLICKERS don’t question its ripeness for satire!
Yet another prediction feather in FLEA FLICKERS BY DAN BROWN’s cap, gang! Remember how we had our Cleaverton team have to change its nickname from Tribesemen, and at first all they could come up with was “Ball Team,” and then years later in real life, the Washington Redskins begat the Football Team? Well, the first pic shows a strip we did in ’16, musing over how pro football’s All-Star game could (and needed to) be tweaked. Now check out the highlighted bits in the second pic: a year after we mentioned a skills challenge, the NFL started doing that on Pro Bowl weekend…but even eerier, in the strip a suggestion to play flag football was poo-pooed because of the non-contact injury potential, which ALSO happened in reality courtesy of Myles Garrett’s busted toe! (Also note the highlighted date of creation of the strip, authenticating its predictive accuracy.) Now, we ain’t sayin’ we’re as good as The Simpsons at predicting the future…but we’re not doing half-bad, though we definitely hope the bit about the prisoner stunt-doubles never comes to fruition…
Two days after a famous groundhog predicted the next six weeks’ weather, a somewhat more infamous rhinoceros takes his fourth stab at predicting this season’s Super Bowl, putting his tenuous 2-and-1 all-time record on the line. He actually (don’t tell him we used that word) pulled off a mighty accurate prognostication of last year’s Big Game; can this sort of thing actually (again, mum’s da woid) become a trend for a man who thinks Cinco De Mayo celebrates five kinds of mayonnaise? As they said in the era of old-timey box-shaped Zeniths, don’t touch that dial!
Fresh off a decent predictive take on the last Supe, and since almost everyone ELSE and their mother has a hat in this ring, Our Rhino on the Street muses over a lot of the biggest news in the N.F.L.’s upcoming off-season. And know what’s awesome about all this? If Zeke’s actually right about any respectable percentage of his predictions, we’ll further parade his predictive prowess! AND, if he’s way out in left field (sorry: wrong sport there)…er, if he’s way off base (crap, same wrong sport!)…um, if he’s just slam wrong about most of the above, we’ll claim he was just doing it for humor value!
The latest edition of our “On Golden Punned” series (Admittedly, we at FLEA FLICKERS BY DAN BROWN have a fairly casual, loose definition of “series”: to us, a series is anything with two installments, with the intention of doing at least a third one.)!
Keep fighting and improving, Damar, and we’ll keep praying.
“We give away real money every week,” pro football wagering sites boast and, while that’s true, even Nostradamus hopped up on a gallon of Red Bull couldn’t get all the specific game stats right in order to score their top prize. But hey, if you went to a horse race and saw one nag’s odds at 673,812:1, you’d lay a buck down on him, wouldn’t ya? 😉
